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9 n" H$ z' }4 Q8 r V8 {* pTahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网% _; R5 D1 X* n# `5 E6 zmso-font-kerning:0pt">QQ9 T* o4 g* r( ], X+ Xfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
9 G2 |9 T2 g: j0 cmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。# _1 y1 S2 L. U9 ~- ?. t0 qmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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5 e4 H# _1 [$ o; W6 k7 Amso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾陆英：9 ?' P" X5 K9 h% I$ J( `mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第, q) S7 n% s2 |4 n4 x; j! W( z! G5 r
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：, o) h. K7 Q2 d( emso-font-kerning:0pt">“ H; N" y/ S5 n" r
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。9 a1 ~6 a% s+ o% Q/ ~mso-font-kerning:0pt">”; @* f1 R; {4 H$ ~" w) d
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8 Z5 R8 }- ^3 Qmso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：2 M9 i4 H$ J0 J( fmso-font-kerning:0pt">“% p1 o& y& O, r' |* c
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。$ |, `9 u8 J* d4 A' wcolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”" [* |0 I4 ~! X" b
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0 [ E) r- d! Jmso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟曰：2 b* M) e; b% v5 q7 s" u
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？# j& R0 \4 p3 p% l( z6 J3 n" h' h" d
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：9 S! ]$ z. f" z6 k: W0 O6 p
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。, t% z' D5 }9 f7 y$ M) rcolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。5 _# ^$ L3 f5 Y7 |7 k8 o# `7 v J
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子请教孔子什么是孝，孔子说：2 {5 p* t- S; P L( p10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“( S4 J o8 S' Z1 Jmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
[, d1 ?; n: |- ^8 U( |mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。( t- z7 {( k7 R8 ], r. ^
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# h4 e/ P0 b' r, m# K. amso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：6 y) [3 ^. D8 D6 ?0 P( y- z0pt">"$ q# J0 T* _5 B$ Imso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:1 s) ^1 X0 D# S
Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。 m0 V5 d5 y! c E" w- ]" K. W' Imso-font-kerning:0pt">"& i, S A7 Z7 e- H8 A& \
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. `/ A0 t7 ]+ X' W& J5 @mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：3 ]+ A: S2 R" \mso-font-kerning:0pt">"5 d9 W. J" s: L9 O3 u0 ?
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1 A% ?8 h1 }. [( \mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢" U( z% f; u0 P8 E
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：* S$ {0 A5 l( d6 i+ q' C5 `mso-font-kerning:0pt">"4 ~% Q7 E" R- o/ T: k8 _0 c% E: u
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。+ o( w3 N6 } S
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) E. F% W' n4 X/ c- ]5 |: Imso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是) b, P" d! a. ?3 y4 f10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">“, Q- f0 C; |6 j: s) ^( r0 Sfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
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# _0 H1 [6 y7 E: ^3 b+ z' Nmso-font-kerning:0pt">答：孔子教人是很讲针对性的。孟懿子不能遵从他父亲贤而好礼之教，所以孔子针对他讲得, d1 q# I/ R% Q4 Z1 Z
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5 B. a& o& d) T, Y9 emso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲' Z' b( P9 X2 j9 a U1 U! ?9 r
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3 F4 l2 k; k8 H7 a! F, u" B: ^9 X' @4 o' Zmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违: T# q) w# l( h9 s; e
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4 W- S$ k* {. A) c% emso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，7 m8 W" a# h6 a- s0 U5 w ?
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。$ A0 h$ v6 X0 Q7 q8 umso-font-kerning:0pt">”3 q( D; U/ t- M2 p# }0 O, g! G
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。# o! h! N& h: m" Amso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？5 v/ w; o! _" H; Z# l4 z9 X1 j10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">答：本章谈孝的重点是，孝要落实到礼上。孔子讲仁与礼的关系，一方面强调仁是礼的核心，礼应当体现仁的精神；另一方面又强调，礼的规定体现了仁的要求，依礼而行就是仁。据此，是否做到了孝，要以是否依礼而行来衡量。3 M( J: y; \7 _; h! J" y2 B( I2 d. vmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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0 Z1 t1 s9 {7 n+ d8 Amso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">小风飕飕地：3 _3 N q- S7 p0 X- T6 G: y9 pmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义; R1 O, R5 B0 t
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- g! w r" U& i5 _- h" gTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！1 h( C9 i3 z1 L" Hmso-font-kerning:0pt">——6 W' A8 E. h) L# Nfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;. F- Y6 Y5 p _( W
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。& R7 Q" {2 @: q7 `5 k! g
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">夕惕若：8 I+ I6 n' `3 W/ h* P: |7 }: a2 [mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述+ ~3 y1 ^1 g! U% p0 a) o
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- u8 u' O+ N* `8 Jmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊( l/ s" c$ W- t' I0 ^mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。! f7 k6 N) P6 Z8 ^mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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孝经
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2 J' M' v% C" t7 NTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。; G0 t8 A2 X8 b1 ~0 w7 a B! Z
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( d; O5 c5 S7 J8 ]0 hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。% ?8 Y9 U8 y/ J
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：4 m6 F& t/ f, j {; A1 omso-font-kerning:0pt">“; N/ I! ]+ C# M7 B+ o, t# ]$ Z9 Qfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
* k* S }/ j" |" M9 X9 J8 f7 q8 lmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。2 ]4 n' ~! ^& R8 U
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3 Q" N% m# ?- |mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个, O! y$ ]! y; r$ u8 F8 Umso-font-kerning:0pt">“, g$ A7 [/ d8 P8 y: rfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
. x$ I1 d2 a6 c8 Kmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬/ k9 y$ q( D# H9 ]9 ]mso-font-kerning:0pt">”4 N2 w9 w" s, V' g% _! i
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Z2 Z, N: q8 w9 _mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为2 R$ T) Z6 M+ }; m: [. wmso-font-kerning:0pt">“2 A4 a. B9 L G% @
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道: ]. O1 M2 D/ r4 p$ O7 U" Z( X
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。7 b. _7 T5 v' R) V, _ m
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5 E* A6 @. h' Z9 H+ jTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的0 X" v4 F) O7 J) S/ |2 c6 W7 [mso-font-kerning:0pt">“+ p) B- T/ r" L1 E
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$ c9 x8 B1 v% Hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思: I8 j! |9 N+ w. k3 w
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