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. T! D, [4 t4 D楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">时间：0 b( _7 ]5 e0 H. E& u, `mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">2014' W) W% I. |, V+ lmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">年8月12日
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& F+ `# r5 o2 x1 M) p楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">地点：1 W8 c& C2 w- h: D+ A% c& nmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">老秘网“文稿修改演播室”（QQ群号：366351120）
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">主讲：0 K. u: M0 G: g' H# Fmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方
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1 b! c4 @( R( T楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">整理：( D' s$ n2 r( {0 V" }7 w1 jmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">杨苏
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* E( f# W) h2 T% h- \6 Q3 I* x8 b楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">具体内容：
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& }& q1 w$ [; i) Bmso-font-kerning:0pt">一、对一篇汇报材料的讨论
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3 ?( n* V9 X; H) P( u- J* ^& t6 E% [: |line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">6 |, h$ v8 A! N* v; G6 ifont-family:黑体;mso-hansi-font-family:黑体;mso-bidi-font-family:黑体">老猫：某市美丽乡村创建工作情况汇报，大家帮某同学推敲一组标题，如何？
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"Times New Roman"">（一）立足转型强村，打造宜业乡村。
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"Times New Roman"">（二）坚持“五水共治”，打造宜人乡村
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line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">. w3 Z- R; t" S: K+ r$ |; G* X"Times New Roman"">（三）着眼增收致富，打造宜农乡村。
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! E4 N$ p S3 C$ U9 y+ f# k/ l; c5 iline-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">/ Q( @ b$ _2 \/ v5 k4 n"Times New Roman"">（四）突出民生保障，打造宜居乡村。
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: b: J5 j, N. A* C- t/ ]1 h7 Xmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">魅力乡村，幸福乡村、宜居乡村、富裕乡村之类的，我的意思是用一根线串起来，让这组小标题形成一个整体。2 p; j6 s+ R2 P, N) cmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方：6 k* D: L* N* P5 gmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">标题分两部分，前半部分亮手段（做法），后半部分凸显成效。四个乡村的思路不错，但内容上缺少支撑，建议再从内容上面抓取下逻辑。另外，感觉题目不足以体现内容。# B: w/ i% F: f4 |/ imso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">胡晓斌：- j. t( z* w; l, ?9 Gmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，内容来讲有并列的，也有逻辑递进关系，不知如何把握。0 J/ w4 ?$ m$ L, t, S: Bmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">猫老：% x2 X4 X8 O& v6 @mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">富增收入，美展新颜。8 y' |4 Q) x& L& p l# {, Smso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">民生保障作为出发点，惠农增收作为增长点呢& [% X$ W) Q9 o6 j& J2 ^* N2 g: ]
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">感觉民生保障包括很多方面，不只是宜居。宜居一般是和生态环境放在一起的，民生保障一般和和谐、幸福搭配在一起。, h" U; z- F+ [
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">顺序调整一下，环境放最后。不知道第一点内容。2 u2 K3 D8 k4 K7 Lmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">胡晓斌：0 [ ^8 ~5 F9 X& a& t7 lmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">整个提纲是这样子的：( H) T+ ~1 j6 l$ `- }mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">! c# s( U8 ~; D# E/ ~+ ]宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">一、三任书记接力干，一张蓝图抓创建! j: V* A4 _: o2 k4 I5 F" kfont-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;4 I" X- S$ R2 l1 K- |+ x
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`' l3 y$ u5 X3 Y% N+ z宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、一以贯之谋创建。- q. W" I7 j. g+ f
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宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、政策支撑强保障。6 I6 @) d3 r: ?$ ^2 I
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line-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">2 g8 u1 _$ n7 W仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">45 o* C# ~8 X. A/ L6 o0 O仿宋_GB2312;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:
7 X: p0 w; G/ Z; r/ c9 p6 Y宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、健全机制促落实。/ O, U" i7 O- `6 b
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( G3 W8 x+ {% t# } |6 g7 {- {- P! m$ Q# Z7 s! \( c& n3 c lline-height:30.0pt;mso-line-height-rule:exactly">* ]" C+ Z, K+ g# q0 R2 F$ ~4 v4 ?% x宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">二、十年时间抓整治，美丽乡村显成效6 }( m& q0 G0 n6 l8 p4 l: Y+ s
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宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">（一）坚持把转型强村作为美丽乡村建设的5 [9 {$ ^* n1 i. a
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">重头戏% O5 W8 |+ x; |) `& w# Ufont-family:宋体;mso-fareast-font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;3 [2 z; k: G- b9 V( |8 u0 O
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，乡村发展水平有效提升。+ W6 J" Z3 M" A2 ^
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宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、依靠主体强动力。, \6 k- P `0 \8 {( V6 q
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宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">、产村联动促增收。/ E2 \2 u- |( P7 I
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宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">个自然村向中心村集聚，建成了拥有1 ^- k; S' F- z2 N" I7 Ymso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">533! } b) l7 v& g9 V14.0pt;font-family:仿宋_GB2312;mso-ascii-font-family:宋体;mso-hansi-font-family:
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mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">1000; A& _2 C1 q% H+ D1 Pmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">多万元。二是发展物业经济。针对区位优势明显的村，通过农村集体建设用地开发和项目建设，盘活土地，投资发展集体物业项目。如城西新区小东陈村，通过与相邻* K8 A0 p* n. i* a2 F
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宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">个村联合建立五星社区，集聚人口! S$ S! E5 j/ j) f. P# U
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">用是可以用，问题不在这里。这个材料感觉像是工作总结，挂了个美丽乡村的头，较牵强。% ?+ D' i% ~8 \* }" I8 s+ e
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我不是这个意思，美丽乡村汇报也好，生态乡村汇报也好，这些内容都可以用。一个汇报材料第一是基本情况，第二是对于创建活动本身的相关情况汇报，第三是做法，第四适当点点问题。当然，问题也可以根据实际情况不点。至于你的措施，应该是结合本情况来的。而且此提纲里，做法没有必要分这么多层次，容易造成逻辑上的混乱。你先要明确出这么几个重点。比如，要说转型，你想表达的转型是什么转型，怎么转型，转出什么成效，结合美丽乡村落到优化产业结构上比较好。8 u5 U4 i# L4 T# @! m0 C& c5 J
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">胡晓斌:' }* ]9 C5 m" l( v( emso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我内容太多了是嘛？: m: i$ j4 z$ W! b8 zmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">飘雪:6 K8 P2 @/ e% L. Vmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">层次可以简化，什么都想说，太杂了。/ l# x2 r: n( n6 r( e4 H2 W
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/ \9 J# K/ n3 k# s' Q7 t楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:( K$ P* J+ O% I( dmso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">不过不是不能说，要理顺一下。举个例子来说，就用猫总凝练的题目（一）坚持把转型强村作为美丽乡村建设的9 E* \7 R: _* b2 G( o+ H" d
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宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，乡村发展水平有效提升。这个标题要写，要明确围绕的中心是转型强村。效果是乡村发展水平。对应转型强村找内容。- U( z6 `9 g: i6 pmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">那我把内容归纳一下，第二部分就点明五六点重点内容。. v3 k4 }2 r8 Q3 @" U
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这也有点像二元标题。+ b( P3 O: Y8 x! \* Qmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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) n& t1 J# z. ]* T$ H( y9 d7 a; v6 Rmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我发表一下个人的想法，有以下几个方面的建议：一是老秘并不了解学员工作的具体环境和具体情况，如果要这样一对一的修改，是需要花费一些时间慢慢对接的；二是就本文来说存在一些逻辑问题，可能是在撰稿之初就犯了一些逻辑性错误，观点（小标题）是根据内容提炼出来的，而本文的小标题对仗工整，乍一看给人的感觉是比较好，但一看内容就有点文不对题了。例如：第一部分，作为乡级政府谈何政策支持？乡镇有制定政策的权限吗？+ ^0 f! q9 |4 d3 t) G. v( N
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">我们是县级市，不是乡镇。" u$ r* W w" c/ O- m6 Z3 ]7 Rmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">县级，包括地市级都没有制定政策的权限，都是贯彻落实上级的政策。此外，从文章的提纲看，二级标题不能囊括内容。! L: s! l9 L1 u" ^
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">县级市应该有制定本县美丽乡村建设实施意见和考核标准、政策支持等权力的吧。二级标题与子标题脱节。. ?: C, e2 w ]: \7 ^2 i7 N- k
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:6 q: l: w4 z" Q0 k# [$ \mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">即便乡镇没有制定政策的权限，但也可以出台一些举措，比如以奖代补，纳入考核。这些可以归入政策层面。3 K& K: Y! |, C! S. G4 M. Cmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这篇六大点，有点多，整合下。- G3 s7 k0 M9 a- q# B# {! Z' qmso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">
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' w% U! {+ n8 u, R S3 Q2 rmso-font-kerning:0pt">二、列提纲、明思路7 V, J2 q K" i8 {" I- S8 j
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mso-hansi-font-family:宋体;mso-bidi-font-family:宋体;mso-font-kerning:0pt">在刚才讨论的基础上，我想谈一谈关于列提纲的一点体会。我所理解的提纲就是动笔之前想好的内容，材料的骨架，也是我们通常所说的谋篇布局。/ z* |- T! Q5 M) Q& z( q
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# ] G6 d8 Y1 I7 o楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">端方:如果反过来，写加强社区制度建设，对93向社区制度进行梳理，非常平，看不出什么特色与亮点来。
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">铁树凝:需求为王，刨树刨根，循此，深挖，梳理片段，轮廓，佐以素材，碰撞，修正思路，揉融观点素材，思路为纲，纲举目张，终是符合有关要求，才算好。
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楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">铁树凝:难在先方有可贵后生！思路素材之间有一碰撞修正过程不是一成不变的，中间很多时候有变化。
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* w5 C: [2 L6 B s! p/ J8 @楷体_GB2312;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">老猫:好标题的灵感从哪里来？老猫的体会是从段落内容中提炼，从个别字词中联想，从上级文件中生发，从参考资料中化用，从交流碰撞中偶得。
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300x180 AD
